Okay, so my husband and my youngest son have gone off on a week long bike trip with our young men's church group. A WEEK LONG! Do you know what that MEANS? I have the WHOLE STINKIN' HOUSE TO MYSELF!!! Just me and the dog.
SO, rules of living alone:
Leave the bathroom door open. Nobody cares.
Talk to yourself. Just do not answer back.
Eat whenever you want, whatever you want and don't share.
Wear whatever you want. Shorts, cami...nobody will judge you
Smile ALOT
Laugh ALOT
Sing really really LOUD
Play with the dog and laugh hysterically. She'll love it
I'll think of more later. It's just so nice the have the whole house to myself. Nobody calling me Mom. Nobody calling me honey. Nobody asking me if I need anything. If I'm hungry. If I'm going to bed soon. What's for dinner. What do I want for dinner. How was work. etcetera etcetera etcetera (in the voice of Yul Brynner in The King and I) Will I miss them? Sure, I'm pretty sure I will, at some point. Probably. Maybe. Undoubtedly. Ya.
So I got home from work and played with the dog. Wrote on my blog (HEY!! How'ya doin'?). Changed into something I wanna wear without worrying that my youngest will be embarrassed. Gotta be all modest when he's around. Now I'm going to go sit in my hammock and play on my ipod, probably fall asleep, nap for awhile, wake up, make some mac and cheese, and watch a scary movie all by myself. Because I can. I don't have to be at work til tomorrow afternoon(you know how much I love that closing shift) so I can stay up late and sleep in. Life is gooooooooood. :)
Monday, July 19, 2010
Friday, July 16, 2010
Let me introduce myself..........
*sigh* This is my first post and I have to admit, I'm pretty overwhelmed. I always thought I'd do this eventually. I mean, I have a million thoughts in my head constantly and most of them I can't tell anyone I know. They'd give me that look. You know that look: The one that says "Did she really just say that?" or "What the heck is she thinking? She's crazy!" SO, I keep most of it to myself. I don't go to therapy. Maybe I should. But, once again, they'd give me that look (meanwhile taking notes about how much institutionalizing me would be a wise choice). I KNOW I have issues. I KNOW I can be pretty manic (and menopause just magnifies it, doesn't it?). But my creative mind...well anyway.
I work in retail. Ever worked in retail? You should. Everyone should work one Christmas season, or back to school season in retail. I think that there is a really warm place in retail hell for some people. Seriously, do you know how much I get paid? When I started, I got paid $8.76. That was a year ago. About 7 months ago, I got promoted. I make about 2 bucks more. Not enough to live off of by myself. But enough to take care of my addiction: shopping. Anyway, I digress. My point being, I may work retail but I do not get paid enough for you to leave everything you've tried on lying on the fitting-room floor, inside out, wrinkled, stinky, etc. Remember that 5 clothing limit sign posted in the fitting room area? No? You didn't see it? Yeah, figures. That would explain why you brought 20 items in the room, tried every one of them on, and then left them scattered around the room. Not on the hangers you pulled them off of. Not refolded the way you took them off of the shelf. Just all lying there. Or crammed behind the bench. Or slung over the little hook on the wall. That's where the hangers go, dummy. After you hang the clothes back on them..
Please, when you head into that fitting room, take a look at the girls cleaning up the clothing in the waiting area. This is a large part of their job and they HATE IT! Every minute of it. Sometimes, if you listen very carefully, you will hear one of them sigh. She's really thinking "I hate my job." or "When is my next break?" or "How soon do I get off?". I am usually thinking "I hate humans". Do us a favor? Please, hang your clothing back up on the hangers. (not inside out, that does us no good) Fold the shirts back up if they were folded. Bring them out to the girls in the waiting area. Politely ask them where they want you to put them. THEN? Thank them for working so hard. You'll be amazed at the smile they will give you. Try it.
And another thing, when you go to check out? Be polite. I've been here all day, cleaning up after you. Listening to you yell at your kids about how much you hate them because they sound like you when they talk back. And you let them wear that? What are you thinking? ANYWAY, when you get to the counter to check out? Smile. Remember that I am human too. I have kids, and bills, and a husband who annoys the crap out of me most of the time. And I come here to get away from home. I might be having a bad day but I have to keep smiling and asking if you found everything alright. And it's required by my boss that I ask you if you want to sign up for our dumb credit card even though I don't believe in credit cards. Otherwise, I 'd just ring up your items and let you go. Smile at me. Be kind. I am not some underling that OWES you. Some day this could be you. Really.
Shoplifters? Don't even get me started. The lowest form of life, as far as I'm concerned. I'll leave that for another rant. Lucky you.
I've been married. 20 years. Alot of it is really fun. Sometimes I've compared my marriage with a roller coaster. You scream, you cover your eyes, you feel exhilarated, you laugh hysterically, you're scared to death, and you want to throw up. Then for some reason, you get back on and go again.
I have 4 children. 4 GORGEOUS WONDERFUL children. My oldest son is 27 years old and married to a wonderful girl. They've been married for 3 years and are still like newlyweds. I wish I had a marriage like them. Seriously. My oldest was actually raised by my ex-husband because I made some really crappy choices when I was young. He was about 6 when my ex remarried. Actually, my ex and his wife did an amazing job. I am very thankful that he was raised by them. Honestly, I don't believe I would have done as good of a job had I raised him myself. He is amazing!! And he loves me anyway. He has already majored in Japanese and is now heading into his 2nd year of animation school. He is so talented! His dream is to eventually work at Pixar. I have no doubt that he will succeed. I love that boy!!!
When my next son was little, he looked like a cherub. Big brown eyes, blonde curly hair, big dimples, and a beautiful smile. He always smiled. Gorgeous! He was a really happy boy. But such an imp! I admit that I wasn't a very good mother. I have and always will love my children. But during a majority of my 20's, I only thought of myself. My two older boys suffered because of it. I cannot apologize enough or ask God for forgiveness enough. You suffer the consequences for your choices always. No matter how much you repent. It always comes back to bite you in the butt. A constant reminder of the choices you have made.
Anyway, back to my second son. He had problems with ADHD (whether or not you believe in ADD or ADHD is your choice. Do not start bugging me about the ill effects of ADD drugs on children, Tom Cruise) and it affected the choices HE made. He would act before thinking. He never thought of the consequences of his choices and it got him in alot of trouble. He was a very smart boy, very artistically talented, prone to the dramatic. So much like his mother!! He was also angry but, since he didn't communicate well at all, he held alot of it in. Right now, I will just say that I love my second son more than life itself and I miss him every day. He is not dead, but he is somewhere where I don't worry about him so much. In a couple of years, I will worry about him constantly and I dread it. I will talk more about him later.
My only daughter just turned 19. I have to say that she is my favorite daughter. I think that even if I had another daughter, she would still be my favorite daughter. You'd have to meet her. When I was pregnant with her, I would pray daily that she would always know how much that I loved her. She turned into the biggest blessing in my life. God knew that I would need her throughout my life. She is my angel, seriously. She is my best friend. Recently she moved out of the state to start a life on her own and she is doing really well. We talk practically every day. Or text, or "Whatsapp" on our Ipods. We keep in touch on Facebook also. She has an absolutely amazing voice yet does not believe that she does. She sang a solo in church a couple of months ago and didn't tell me she was. She didn't want me there, I'm guessing. My brother told me how wonderful she was-even made him cry. I wish I had seen it. I love to sit next to her in church and sing with her. She sings Alto when she could sing Saprano. I sing Saprano. We harmonize beautifully. She has the personality I wish I'd had when I was her age. I want to be her when I grow up, as I always say. She's smart and loving and the best friend to all she meets. She's funny and crazy and has a spirit all of her own. She's a photographer in the making. She will be amazing someday. She's gorgeous and has amazingly green eyes. I will come back to her later.
My last little monkey is 17 and going in to his senior year in hs. When he was little, I didn't put him in a day care or preschool. He spent his time with me. I could take him everywhere with me and he was always well-behaved. I would listen to my girlfriend's sons scream and she would scream at them (in public) and I would always look at my baby and tell him thankyou for being such a good boy. He is still his mother's child. He is funny and silly and has great fashion sense (like his sister and brothers). He can make me laugh and cry and sometimes both at the same time. He plays the trumpet in his hs and has played since elementary school. He picked it up easily and his talent has only increased through the years. I never get tired of hearing him play. His grades are better than his older brother but he still has the problem of concentrating. His biggest problem is not getting his homework done. He is so smart and I hate to see it wasted when he could be so much more! He wants to either go into the Navy (my vote) or the Marines. He is currently in his hs NJROTC so he is being trained beforehand. He looks so wonderful in his uniform. I know he will do well in either. I just want to protect him. As my last child, he is also a blessing.
Don't get me wrong, all of my children are a blessing in their own ways! I wouldn't trade any of them for all of the money in the world. My life would be so empty without them!
I have so many more things to say but I will go to bed for now. This took me two days to write-mostly because my laptop doesn't like me! hahaha Please come back and read more. And let me know what you think. Be kind for I am only a writer. A woman with an opinion. Needing to vent to someone who will understand. I hope that is you.
I work in retail. Ever worked in retail? You should. Everyone should work one Christmas season, or back to school season in retail. I think that there is a really warm place in retail hell for some people. Seriously, do you know how much I get paid? When I started, I got paid $8.76. That was a year ago. About 7 months ago, I got promoted. I make about 2 bucks more. Not enough to live off of by myself. But enough to take care of my addiction: shopping. Anyway, I digress. My point being, I may work retail but I do not get paid enough for you to leave everything you've tried on lying on the fitting-room floor, inside out, wrinkled, stinky, etc. Remember that 5 clothing limit sign posted in the fitting room area? No? You didn't see it? Yeah, figures. That would explain why you brought 20 items in the room, tried every one of them on, and then left them scattered around the room. Not on the hangers you pulled them off of. Not refolded the way you took them off of the shelf. Just all lying there. Or crammed behind the bench. Or slung over the little hook on the wall. That's where the hangers go, dummy. After you hang the clothes back on them..
Please, when you head into that fitting room, take a look at the girls cleaning up the clothing in the waiting area. This is a large part of their job and they HATE IT! Every minute of it. Sometimes, if you listen very carefully, you will hear one of them sigh. She's really thinking "I hate my job." or "When is my next break?" or "How soon do I get off?". I am usually thinking "I hate humans". Do us a favor? Please, hang your clothing back up on the hangers. (not inside out, that does us no good) Fold the shirts back up if they were folded. Bring them out to the girls in the waiting area. Politely ask them where they want you to put them. THEN? Thank them for working so hard. You'll be amazed at the smile they will give you. Try it.
And another thing, when you go to check out? Be polite. I've been here all day, cleaning up after you. Listening to you yell at your kids about how much you hate them because they sound like you when they talk back. And you let them wear that? What are you thinking? ANYWAY, when you get to the counter to check out? Smile. Remember that I am human too. I have kids, and bills, and a husband who annoys the crap out of me most of the time. And I come here to get away from home. I might be having a bad day but I have to keep smiling and asking if you found everything alright. And it's required by my boss that I ask you if you want to sign up for our dumb credit card even though I don't believe in credit cards. Otherwise, I 'd just ring up your items and let you go. Smile at me. Be kind. I am not some underling that OWES you. Some day this could be you. Really.
Shoplifters? Don't even get me started. The lowest form of life, as far as I'm concerned. I'll leave that for another rant. Lucky you.
I've been married. 20 years. Alot of it is really fun. Sometimes I've compared my marriage with a roller coaster. You scream, you cover your eyes, you feel exhilarated, you laugh hysterically, you're scared to death, and you want to throw up. Then for some reason, you get back on and go again.
I have 4 children. 4 GORGEOUS WONDERFUL children. My oldest son is 27 years old and married to a wonderful girl. They've been married for 3 years and are still like newlyweds. I wish I had a marriage like them. Seriously. My oldest was actually raised by my ex-husband because I made some really crappy choices when I was young. He was about 6 when my ex remarried. Actually, my ex and his wife did an amazing job. I am very thankful that he was raised by them. Honestly, I don't believe I would have done as good of a job had I raised him myself. He is amazing!! And he loves me anyway. He has already majored in Japanese and is now heading into his 2nd year of animation school. He is so talented! His dream is to eventually work at Pixar. I have no doubt that he will succeed. I love that boy!!!
When my next son was little, he looked like a cherub. Big brown eyes, blonde curly hair, big dimples, and a beautiful smile. He always smiled. Gorgeous! He was a really happy boy. But such an imp! I admit that I wasn't a very good mother. I have and always will love my children. But during a majority of my 20's, I only thought of myself. My two older boys suffered because of it. I cannot apologize enough or ask God for forgiveness enough. You suffer the consequences for your choices always. No matter how much you repent. It always comes back to bite you in the butt. A constant reminder of the choices you have made.
Anyway, back to my second son. He had problems with ADHD (whether or not you believe in ADD or ADHD is your choice. Do not start bugging me about the ill effects of ADD drugs on children, Tom Cruise) and it affected the choices HE made. He would act before thinking. He never thought of the consequences of his choices and it got him in alot of trouble. He was a very smart boy, very artistically talented, prone to the dramatic. So much like his mother!! He was also angry but, since he didn't communicate well at all, he held alot of it in. Right now, I will just say that I love my second son more than life itself and I miss him every day. He is not dead, but he is somewhere where I don't worry about him so much. In a couple of years, I will worry about him constantly and I dread it. I will talk more about him later.
My only daughter just turned 19. I have to say that she is my favorite daughter. I think that even if I had another daughter, she would still be my favorite daughter. You'd have to meet her. When I was pregnant with her, I would pray daily that she would always know how much that I loved her. She turned into the biggest blessing in my life. God knew that I would need her throughout my life. She is my angel, seriously. She is my best friend. Recently she moved out of the state to start a life on her own and she is doing really well. We talk practically every day. Or text, or "Whatsapp" on our Ipods. We keep in touch on Facebook also. She has an absolutely amazing voice yet does not believe that she does. She sang a solo in church a couple of months ago and didn't tell me she was. She didn't want me there, I'm guessing. My brother told me how wonderful she was-even made him cry. I wish I had seen it. I love to sit next to her in church and sing with her. She sings Alto when she could sing Saprano. I sing Saprano. We harmonize beautifully. She has the personality I wish I'd had when I was her age. I want to be her when I grow up, as I always say. She's smart and loving and the best friend to all she meets. She's funny and crazy and has a spirit all of her own. She's a photographer in the making. She will be amazing someday. She's gorgeous and has amazingly green eyes. I will come back to her later.
My last little monkey is 17 and going in to his senior year in hs. When he was little, I didn't put him in a day care or preschool. He spent his time with me. I could take him everywhere with me and he was always well-behaved. I would listen to my girlfriend's sons scream and she would scream at them (in public) and I would always look at my baby and tell him thankyou for being such a good boy. He is still his mother's child. He is funny and silly and has great fashion sense (like his sister and brothers). He can make me laugh and cry and sometimes both at the same time. He plays the trumpet in his hs and has played since elementary school. He picked it up easily and his talent has only increased through the years. I never get tired of hearing him play. His grades are better than his older brother but he still has the problem of concentrating. His biggest problem is not getting his homework done. He is so smart and I hate to see it wasted when he could be so much more! He wants to either go into the Navy (my vote) or the Marines. He is currently in his hs NJROTC so he is being trained beforehand. He looks so wonderful in his uniform. I know he will do well in either. I just want to protect him. As my last child, he is also a blessing.
Don't get me wrong, all of my children are a blessing in their own ways! I wouldn't trade any of them for all of the money in the world. My life would be so empty without them!
I have so many more things to say but I will go to bed for now. This took me two days to write-mostly because my laptop doesn't like me! hahaha Please come back and read more. And let me know what you think. Be kind for I am only a writer. A woman with an opinion. Needing to vent to someone who will understand. I hope that is you.
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